Monday, September 04, 2006

Learn to Speak Charltonish

With globalisation seemingly an unstoppable force, it is increasingly important to learn a second language. Although French, German and Spanish are most commonly taught in the UK, a number of schools are beginning to offer 'Charltonish' and 'Charltonish for Business', particularly those in South-East London where the dialect is virtually interchangeable with English. Although it is a difficult language to master, the knowledge of some key words and phrases will help you to be understood.

Curbishley, verb (kurbishlee): to go on too long; eg. "I enjoyed the film, but I felt it had curbishleyed by the end."

Lisbie, verb (lizbee): to believe in, despite evidence to the contrary; eg. "My kids still lisbie Father Christmas despite seeing me leaving their presents out."

Rommedahl, adjective (romerdahl): fast, but otherwise useless; eg. "The new Mazda coupe is a pleasure to drive, but it'll be rommedahl for anyone with a family or for shopping trips."

Kishishev, verb (kishishev): to be misunderstood and/or underappreciated; eg. "I feel like I'm kishisheved at work - I had a great year but was overlooked for promotion."

Dowie, verb, noun (douee): to return home via a convoluted route; a long journey home eg. "I had such a dowie last night - I fell asleep on the N89, woke up in Erith and had to walk an hour back to Welling."

Jordan, adjective (jawduhn): resentful, bitter (usually about losing something); eg. "I'm not jordan about the fact that she's left me, I'm jordan about the fact that she kept the house."

Jeffers, noun (jeferz): excessive or unnecessary expenditure or outlay of money (which ultimately disappoints); eg. "My new BMW needs repairing again - it's been a complete jeffers ever since I bought it."

Karkouri, verb (kahkawree): to exhibit rare but damaging bouts of madness; eg. "We've had to put the dog down - he's usually so docile but he karkouried and attacked the neighbour's toddler."

Murphy, verb (murfee): to misjudge and overestimate an alternative; eg. "Don't risk ruining your marriage by murphying this bird at work."

Mervynday, adjective (murvindey): lacking obvious meaning, ineffectual; eg. "This button on the TV remote control seems to be mervynday."

Euell, verb (yoouhl): to sell something for considerably less than you paid for it; eg. "I think we're going to have to euell the house despite being in negative equity."


At 10:24 PM, Blogger Iain Dowie's Red Army said...

Brilliant, that made me laugh out loud!

At 9:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

fantastic , very clever

At 12:36 PM, Blogger Pedro45 said...


At 3:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very good, but haven’t you forgotten the following ?

Kiely (verb) – to slice, hook or mishit

Example – I kielied my second shot at the ninth and ended up out of bounds.

At 3:23 PM, Blogger New York Addick said...

Clearly there is plenty of scope for an advanced course of Charltonish.

At 10:22 AM, Anonymous Jeff in London said...

This clearly demonstrates a serious requirement for a parallel language for all premier league clubs - other of course than the Chelsea, Arsenal, Man Utd of this world.

I suggest a worthy start shoulbe The Blades (aka Sheffield United) whilst they are still up there with the big boys.

Any takers?

At 2:18 PM, Blogger Ian said...

To Costa(Verb): To take a sabbatical:eg. "My boss doesn't understand me so I'll take a Costa for a few months".

At 2:29 PM, Blogger Ian said...

To Mortimer (Verb): To be a man in IKEA: eg. "The Missus is doing her thing, so I'm just mooching around looking for scraps".

At 2:33 PM, Blogger Ian said...

Ambrose(colloq):eg."I'm such an Ambrose".


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