Valley of Dreams? In your dreams

On Sunday I received the following email notification from Amazon.com: "We wanted to let you know that there is a delay with some items in the order you placed on August 09 2006.." And what you might ask might have been contained in the said order? Well, Alan Curbishley's eagerly awaited autobiography of course.

My decision to remove the Amazon.com advert on my blog a couple of weeks ago is now clearly fully justified by recent events. In truth, I removed it because my quarterly update from the company revealed my blog hadn't received enough 'click-throughs' to warrant even the $10 minimum they are prepared to shell out. Moreover, I realised it was probably time to end my exciting synergistic commercial relationship with the world's largest internet retailer when I bought a new Ipod on Amazon and forgot to click to the site through my own blog. I'm not sure what the opposite of insider trading is, but that's probably what it constitutes.

Yesterday I completed the New York City half-marathon and as a result my legs are shot to bits, a perfect occasion surely to have sat back, relaxed and read Curbs' memoirs cover-to-cover. For those of you that were eagerly cheering me on in a subliminal sense, I completed the race in a personal best of 1:57:57 to finish ahead of 59% of the competitors (if living in the US has taught me anything, it's to accentuate the positive). My time neatly equates to an exact pace of 9.00 minutes per mile, ironic given that's my lucky number. Unfortunately I got very badly boxed coming out of Central Park and couldn't make my way through the crowds to claim a famous victory, conceding it instead to Tom Nyariki of Kenya whose lucky number must be 4.41.

I'm not sure what has caused the unexpected delay in delivery, but surely it can't be due to unprecedented demand from Wichita, Kansas to Des Moines, Iowa for Valley of Dreams? Perhaps the title has confused the Yanks and led them to believe it's yet another 'get rich quick' guide to fulfiling the 'American Dream' (perhaps by moving to Silicon Valley). Or perhaps the incredible productivity of Curbishley's publicist may have awoken Uncle Sam to Charlton's amazing story. As has been documented elsewhere, you can't turn on the TV or radio without hearing his dulcet monotones.

I jest of course; he deserves his day in the limelight and as expected he comes over every bit as honest and genuine as he did as our manager. I was particularly touched by the insight that he was out running when he was delighted to hear that Darren Bent had scored at West Ham, (particularly as I was out running myself when he told me). He also has a likeable habit of saying 'we' instead of 'Charlton'.

Early reviews of Valley of Dreams suggest it's an interesting read (albeit mainly for Charlton fans) but not an earth-shattering synopsis of his outstanding achievements. Perhaps this shouldn't be a surprise; after all most of the joy of sport is in the moment, not in a historical record of what occurred. To paraphrase Elvis Costello's quote about music, perhaps writing about sport is like dancing about architecture.

The best sports books I've read (and in fairness I tend to avoid them) have been written by those who were not great achievers, the memoirs of Tony Cascarino or Simon Hughes spring to mind for example. The reason surely is that in their weaknesses, one can see a little bit of ourselves. Reading the memoirs of say Tiger Woods would only be of mild ex post interest, and not because it would almost certainly be bland. Let's just say that I'd rather watch Woods, but read about John Daly.

At the very least, my hopes for Valley of Dreams rest upon garnering a few interesting behind-the-scenes anecdotes that throw colour upon the club. In truth however I'd love to get some further insight into what really made him such a successful manager which is something a simple chronicle is unlikely to achieve. It would hardly be proprietary information after all, since the 'secret sauce' is probably in the execution not the formulation. How did he manage to turn average players into over-achievers? What were the key elements of his teamtalks? What traits did he seek in new signings? These are the questions I'd love to have answered but I fear I will be left disappointed when Amazon finally deliver on their promise.