Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Dowie's Appointment - THE TRUTH

As part of its investigation into the unusual circumstances surrounding Iain Dowie's sudden dismissal, New York Addick has managed to secure the minutes of the team manager selection meeting attended by Board members. They are reproduced below, though snippets of conversation heard over tea and biscuits prior to the meeting led to an extraordinary decision.
-----------------

(Board members have congregated in the Tom Hovi Suite for tea and biscuits prior to the meeting)

Martin Simons: I've a banging hangover this morning....bit of a late one in the pub last night. Put an extra sugar in my tea, love.
Richard Murray: Plus ça change.
Simons: Was a cracking night actually. My team (Andy Reid's Right Foot) won the Sunday night pub quiz on a tiebreak - had to answer four extra questions correctly.
Murray: Go on, ask me the questions....I'm sure a man of my considerable intellect won't struggle.
Simons: Alright then, here goes. 1. Which letter of the alphabet precedes the words 'mail', 'commerce' and 'coli'?; 2. What is the name of the Queen's only daughter?; 3. What 'D' is the nickname of the main US share index?; and 4. What letter would you have on the back of your car if you were Spanish and driving your car abroad?
Murray: I'll get back to you.

(Board members move to the formal meeting room)

------------------
MINUTES OF THE TEAM MANAGER SELECTION COMMITTEE, 29 MAY 2006
RALPH MILNE ROOM, THE VALLEY
Present: R.Murray, M. Simons, P.Varney, R.Whitehand
Apologies: B.Hughes (not on the committee, but just wanted to apologise)
--------------------------


Murray: I believe we have a quorum. Peter, would you be kind enough to take the minutes?
Varney: Yes sir.
Murray: No need to be so formal Peter, "Mr Murray" is fine.
Varney: Right you are Mr Murray.
Murray: Now gentlemen, as I think you are all aware we no longer have a team manager.
Simons: I wondered why I hadn't seen Curbs at the training ground.
Varney: That reminds me, the cleaner found a couple of his boxes; I must get them back to him. Nothing major, just a few old Who LPs and some training manuals with names like "The Flexible Footballer" and "Everyone Back - The Modern Way to Defend Corners."
Murray: I'm not sure I could handle much more of that.
Simons: Let's get on with it, I feel awful. Richie-boy, have you got those quiz answers yet?
Murray: Don't you worry Mart, I'll have them for you by the end of the meeting.
Varney: Now gentlemen, as you know we have received hundreds of applications for the manager's job and we have interviewed a number of outstanding candidates.
Whitehand: Are we not going to call that New York Addick fella over for a chat - I found his application rather intriguing?
Murray: Me too, but we can't afford his air fare - let's just focus on the ones we've met.
Simons: As far as I'm concerned we can narrow it down to three: Davies, Dowie, Taylor.
Whitehand: I'm almost falling off my chair with excitement. Peter, you'd better book some more Valley Express buses to fill the seats.

(much merriment requiring a five-minute break)

Varney: Now look gentlemen, let's try to focus on the matter at hand. We've all met the three candidates, I propose we go around the table on a one-man, one-vote basis.
Simons: Seems awfully democratic but I suppose it's the way the world's going these days. Got those answers yet Richard?
Murray: Patience, Martin.
Varney: As you two can't seem to have your minds elsewhere, I'll begin. I must admit to being very impressed with Dowie's positive thinking and intelligence, and I'm satisifed he will deal with the commuting satisfactorily so it's Dowie for me.
Whitehand: Thanks Peter but I see it differently. I know Peter Taylor had an awful time at Leicester but he's highly regarded and knows the young English players better than anyone and that will be a key source of new players so it's Taylor for me.
Simons: I know he's a bit vertically-challenged, but I do like a short one (particularly after a few pints) so I'm going to punt for wee Billy Davies.
Varney: It looks like Richard is going to have the casting vote as usual.
Murray: I'VE GOT IT!
Varney: Got what?
Murray: I'VE GOT THE SOLUTION. I'VE GOT THE ANSWERS.
Varney: (puzzled) Well go on then, I think we all need a solution after 15 years of Curbs.
Murray: The answer is......E.....Anne.....Dow.....E.
Varney: Well there we have it.....Dowie it is then.
Murray: No those are the answers to Martin's pub quiz tie-breaker. I want to vote for Billy Davies.
Varney: It's too late, it's already in the minutes. Changing it back would be tantamount to fraud and that's just not how a club like Charlton operates.
Murray: Oh alright then, I'll blag the press conference.


4 Comments:

At 5:23 PM, Anonymous BW said...

Genius!

 
At 6:22 PM, Anonymous Texas Addick said...

Well, after hearing the clubs statement today along with Peter Varneys Interview on Sky Sports (thanks cynic),we sort of know what the problem was,and I do not believe it was a knee jerk reaction by the board based soley on results and league position, (but it didnt help Dowie either),why do I say this,I base it on two major factors mentioned in the clubs statement.
The first factor mentioned, and I quote from Richard Murrays statement, was: "Over the past two weeks we have conducted a review of the structure we put in place during the summer which involved all senior football management staff."Now to me the comment of senior football management staff involved Mills,Dowie,Reed and Robson,Mills was brought in during the summer to take some load off Richard Murray on dealings in transfers,and as a go between with Dowie and the board etc.
Dowie has gone,but,this management structure is still in place as I see it,so the Board must still think it is workable,hence the fundemental working of it was never a problem.
So what was the problem that led to Dowies departure?,the clue is in the 2nd factor I mentioned in the clubs statement, quote: -"In the situation we find ourselves in, it is also vital that everyone works as a team. Unfortunately, I have to say that has not been the case".so someone in that group of four was not a team player, which again seems to me to focus on Dowie and his relationship with his coaching staff,was Dowie confering with them?,was he listening to any advice Les Reed was giving him?,was Dowie going it alone?,we may never know that answer fully,but I do not believe this started with any player revolt as many of the daily papers want to suggest.
So now we have Les Reed as Head Coach, and right now he has one of the hardest tasks in football in pulling us out of this slump,any genuine charlton fan will give him their full backing and get behind the club,as now, more than ever since the dark days of selhurst the club and players need us to get behind them,not write on message boards of the BBC and Sky Sports how pathetic the board are,if it wasnt for this board we wouldnt have a football team to support,and thats something we all need to bare in mind and never forget.

 
At 7:02 PM, Blogger Chicago Addick said...

Agree Texas - those Sky and BBC boards are for muppets and wind up merchants.

 
At 12:52 AM, Blogger Reet Smoot said...

spot on. charlton life we be having a t shirt sale by the look of things.....hey you guys!

 

Post a Comment

<< Home